Random Ouch!

What an itchy weekend! A doctor-prescribed acne antibiotic broke me out in HIVES! (A word I did not know the meaning of until I actually GOT the bastards!) Anyway, a bus ride and a short walk to a ghetto doctor provided me with something to combat the allergic reaction. Hopefully it's completely gone in a few days.

Had a very humbling experience today after work while shopping for work clothes... Got about 10 pairs of pants and a couple shirts... Realized that I'm FAT and need to invest in Hip Hop Abs right away (Or steal the Tae-Bo DVDs that are collecting dust on my mother's entertainment center.)

At the end of work, today I had a meeting with the paralegal and one of the partners. I was horrified that they were gonna like, FIRE me or something. In fact, they did just the opposite. They praised the way that I'm progressing and turning their criticims into self-improvement (Yaaaay Me!) Then discussed the increasing legal responsibilities that they're gonna be giving me because I'm catching on so quickly. God is SO amazing!

What a great turnaround from last week, in which I was insulted and berated to the point of tears for making honest mistakes that ANYONE would make in their first 2 weeks. (I ain't let them see me cry, though.) After my horrible day at work (Thursday) I went to my "friend"?'s (That word takes on so much meaning these days. I prefer to use "associate", but it's 3 whole more syllables!) house where I received a pep talk about CERTAIN people's intentions in the corporate world. He informed me that as the CEO of his company, he doesn't have time to yell at/belittle the people who work way below him, and the fact that these two attorneys treat the low man on the totem pole (myself) like crap at any given moment shows a faulty power structure within the company. This may very well be true, but the million dollar clients and the reputation of the firm aid in not discouraging me from wanting to work for them in the future! Shoot.

Plus, I'm entitled to my one moment of weakness, and if there's anything I'm learning from relationships, it's how to develop a thick skin. Everything I've been through has prepared me to humbly accept their criticsm unless it becomes mentally damaging. I don't think it can though. I've been through worse. I don't like being yelled at, but at least I know it's not just me. I was warned by the paralegal, office manager, and one of the associates that one is a "screamer" and one is a "bitch". Words from their own mouths.

It is what it is. My new philosophy. And if it doesn't benefit me to change it, it will remain what it is. I had a great time at church Sunday. Found a new favorite gospel song. "Surgery" by L. Spencer Smith. "Lord, I admit I need you to do surgery on me!"

I'm changing my relationships. Looking for friends who are into the same things as I. Intellectually stimulating activities for evenings and weekends, not just club-hopping. I've been wanting to go to a comedy show and a spoken word set. I thought I would ask the aforementioned "friend"? to take me Sunday, but I didn't hear from him in time, so oh well. Not having a car sucks, because if I did, I wouldn't have a self-imposed sunset curfew... I just can't be out here on the bus at night. Not in this neighborhood. Not alone. Not with the "abandoned" building next door, through the window of which I saw a naked man walking around and heard rumors that a lady was dragged inside and raped... NOPE... Sunset Curfew 'til I get my car... February's my goal. At least I can enjoy total freedom NEXT SUMMER...