Thursday, July 23, 2009
I'm going to Bible Study
And I'm going to listen really hard. Maybe God will speak to me there, b/c Idk why but I keep missing him. I feel like my life is crashing down around me and everything that could possibly go wrong, is.
Friday, July 17, 2009
RING, DANGIT!!!
Stupid Blackberry. Okay. I won't blame you, Blackberry, but if I haven't heard anything by 3pm, I'm picking up the phone and calling the office myself.
IDK how much longer I can pretend to surf the net in this office on my last day of work while waiting for the phone to ring.
I'm gonna make a practice call to ensure that this thing is working properly.
Okay... Working.
Now I'm gonna call from my work phone.
Okay... Working.
I asked Grandmommy to finance a Dell Laptop for me, since I know I won't qualify for financing on my own. She has to "think about it". She offered to just give me $400 but I'm trying to tell her that I'm not asking for money, I'm asking for credit! I'm gonna pay the darn thing off as soon as I get my refund check, but with all these other things I'll have to be getting acclimated with a month from now, I don't want the laptop to be one of them. I kinda want it like... now... so I can figure out how everything works before hand.
People keep trying to convince me that I don't need a purple laptop to be happy. Especially since I could buy a perfectly good, cheaper, lighter, laptop elsewhere. I'm basically paying $200-$300 more so the thing can be purple. More than likely, I'll have to leave to doggie with my mother when I go to law school. So, though the purple laptop won't keep me warm and cuddle with me at night, it'll bring me some joy.
Anyway. I think I'm gonna leave work now. Or maybe I should wait until 3-ish to show the new lady one last time how to file and process things at court.
*sigh*
IDK how much longer I can pretend to surf the net in this office on my last day of work while waiting for the phone to ring.
I'm gonna make a practice call to ensure that this thing is working properly.
Okay... Working.
Now I'm gonna call from my work phone.
Okay... Working.
I asked Grandmommy to finance a Dell Laptop for me, since I know I won't qualify for financing on my own. She has to "think about it". She offered to just give me $400 but I'm trying to tell her that I'm not asking for money, I'm asking for credit! I'm gonna pay the darn thing off as soon as I get my refund check, but with all these other things I'll have to be getting acclimated with a month from now, I don't want the laptop to be one of them. I kinda want it like... now... so I can figure out how everything works before hand.
People keep trying to convince me that I don't need a purple laptop to be happy. Especially since I could buy a perfectly good, cheaper, lighter, laptop elsewhere. I'm basically paying $200-$300 more so the thing can be purple. More than likely, I'll have to leave to doggie with my mother when I go to law school. So, though the purple laptop won't keep me warm and cuddle with me at night, it'll bring me some joy.
Anyway. I think I'm gonna leave work now. Or maybe I should wait until 3-ish to show the new lady one last time how to file and process things at court.
*sigh*
Friday, July 10, 2009
What Would You Do? (Response Requested)
In the image of a fellow blogger, Bloggal, I'm asking my readers a couple questions:
What would you do/feel/think if you had reason to believe that someone you once (very recently) had very strong romantic feelings for was now in love or falling in love with someone else?
Would it make any difference if you guys ended on bad terms?
What if you hadn't spoken to this person in a while before you found out about this new love interest. Does that change things?
I'll explain later, and I look forward to any responses.
What would you do/feel/think if you had reason to believe that someone you once (very recently) had very strong romantic feelings for was now in love or falling in love with someone else?
Would it make any difference if you guys ended on bad terms?
What if you hadn't spoken to this person in a while before you found out about this new love interest. Does that change things?
I'll explain later, and I look forward to any responses.
OMFG(osh) and An Update
Early this morning,I came across some horrible, heart-stopping, news, but I'm not ready to share it with the world. Partially, because it's already been shared with the world... The entire world. By a pretty "reputable" source. It gives a whole new meaning to the term "repuatble". Like some people can really take the truth and twist it so much that it fits around their own little phucked up slanted hypotheses like a glove. (I feel way more sympathy for the late and great Michael Jackson than ever before.) The whole damn world could potentially be talking about me (or at least the whole United States)... I'm not exaggerating. And if you want to find it, you can find it. You just may not know that it pertains DIRECTLY to me. I'm hoping that this news doesn't affect me in the worst way. I've only told two people about it: the BFF (formerly known as Ex-Bff) and another friend. I"m not even gonna tell my mother. Not necessarily because it's "that bad". But because I don't want to hear her negativity about the situation. Also, I really don't know WHAT to think about the news. I don't know how bad or good it is. At least I know that I'm on the mind of a certain person I REALLY needed to be thinking about me, especially right now. I just hope that the capacity in which my name has come up hasn't potentially ruined my life. I know, I sound so dramatic, but it really is kind of a big deal.
For now, I'll be praying. I have NO clue what the outcome of this news could be. Once I shoved my heart from my throat back into my chest, and Google Talk-ed to a friend about it, I felt a little better. I'm waiting on some answers. My impatience with the whole electronic communication thing is wearing thin (thinner than it already was). I'm sorry I'm being so cryptic. It really is quite an interesting story. Or maybe it's just interesting to me because it affects a HUGE (one of the most important) aspects of my life. I'll post about it as SOON as I have a resolution.
Anyway, in efforts to not think much about my impending law school future, which is practically one month away, I will say the following and the following only, until I hear an update, or drive to my second choice, whichever happens first. I haven't gotten off the waiting list at the Alma Mater...Yet. I hope that I'll be admitted in the next week or two. A girl that I graduated from Undergrad with is a student at the Alma Mater. She was admitted to the Alma Mater's law school in mid-to-late July of last year. She had the same LSAT score as me. So I feel that it's a possibility. On 7/20, I have plans to drive out of state to find an apartment in the town of 2nd choice, if I have not yet heard from Alma Mater. I'll probably give the Alma one last desperate phone call the morning of my trip. I really don't see the point of going to get an apartment (meaning spending about $100 on gas and $500 to 600 as a deposit) only to get admitted into the Alma mater in the next week or two, and having to pay a seat deposit to Alma Mater AND pay a deposit in that town. Then I'd have to find a subletter for the apartment in 2nd Choicetown. Not only do I not see the point, but I don't have the money for that foolishness. Law school admissions are the most vicious game ever. End rant. I really don't wanna write about this stuff anymore. I wish I could stop thinking about it.
I have a part time job selling shots in different clubs in the city. It's kinda fun I guess. I haven't made much $ yet. One girl I work with made $700 one night and $500 the next. That possibility is the only thing that's making me stick around. What I hate? The company is kind of rebuilding after an inside betrayal, so they went from 70 girls to like 6 or 7, and a ton of venues to like one. So it's kind of bootlegg right now. Also, we have to dress somewhat skimpy. I'm almost 24 years old and I'm a lady. Over-the-top T&A showage is not in my lifestyle anymore. I've long since learned that you don't have to dress slutty to dress sexy. I'll post a pic of one of my work "outfits" one day if I can get a friend to take one.
My last day of working full time (unless I do this special project for my mom's boss) is exactly one week from today. I've been displaced. The trainee has taken my spot at the front desk and I am now in this little corner office away from everyone. I kind of love it. I finally have computer screen privacy (hence, why I have time to blog when I should be organizing pleadings.) I'm gonna miss everyone, but I'm excited about the next phase of my life as well.
Ummmm, what else?
I had dinner with a girl I ex-ed out of my life last summer, due to a misunderstanding. It was surprisingly easy to talk to her. Idk about actually becoming "friends" with her again, or whether either of us have a desire to do so, but, we'll see what happens. She's going to school at the Alma Mater in the fall, so, if I attend, there's a better chance that we will begin speaking on a regular basis again, and who knows where that will lead?
My mother asked me to be a co-borrower for a home mortgage so she doesn't have to miss out on the $8,000 home-buyers stimulus check. Yeah right. $200,000+? My senior year of college, we had a disagreement about her paying me back $40. And to be trapped in that for 35 years? IDK what she was thinking.
I speak to my uncle now, after a huge blowup. He's still selfish, and he bough himself some little raggedy fall-apart car. He parks this piece of crap in the garage, but one Saturday morning, he tried to express some concern for my well-being by telling me that he saw some men in our backyard and asking me to be careful. I feel if he really cared about my safety, he wouldn't have me struggling to find street parking late at night, esp. in my neighborhood. (Which reminds me... I hope this isn't like last Friday night, when I returnd home from "work" around 3am and had to circle the block for 15 minutes before finally finding a spot a block and a half away down a dark street.)
I don't have any other updates, except a couple that I'll make a separate posts about.
I'm sorry if my tone is a little negative or melancholy. I'm under a lot of stress right now, b/c I don't know where I'll be in the next month, and it's super important. I'm doing everything in my power to maintain a positive outlook on everything.
For now, I'll be praying. I have NO clue what the outcome of this news could be. Once I shoved my heart from my throat back into my chest, and Google Talk-ed to a friend about it, I felt a little better. I'm waiting on some answers. My impatience with the whole electronic communication thing is wearing thin (thinner than it already was). I'm sorry I'm being so cryptic. It really is quite an interesting story. Or maybe it's just interesting to me because it affects a HUGE (one of the most important) aspects of my life. I'll post about it as SOON as I have a resolution.
Anyway, in efforts to not think much about my impending law school future, which is practically one month away, I will say the following and the following only, until I hear an update, or drive to my second choice, whichever happens first. I haven't gotten off the waiting list at the Alma Mater...Yet. I hope that I'll be admitted in the next week or two. A girl that I graduated from Undergrad with is a student at the Alma Mater. She was admitted to the Alma Mater's law school in mid-to-late July of last year. She had the same LSAT score as me. So I feel that it's a possibility. On 7/20, I have plans to drive out of state to find an apartment in the town of 2nd choice, if I have not yet heard from Alma Mater. I'll probably give the Alma one last desperate phone call the morning of my trip. I really don't see the point of going to get an apartment (meaning spending about $100 on gas and $500 to 600 as a deposit) only to get admitted into the Alma mater in the next week or two, and having to pay a seat deposit to Alma Mater AND pay a deposit in that town. Then I'd have to find a subletter for the apartment in 2nd Choicetown. Not only do I not see the point, but I don't have the money for that foolishness. Law school admissions are the most vicious game ever. End rant. I really don't wanna write about this stuff anymore. I wish I could stop thinking about it.
I have a part time job selling shots in different clubs in the city. It's kinda fun I guess. I haven't made much $ yet. One girl I work with made $700 one night and $500 the next. That possibility is the only thing that's making me stick around. What I hate? The company is kind of rebuilding after an inside betrayal, so they went from 70 girls to like 6 or 7, and a ton of venues to like one. So it's kind of bootlegg right now. Also, we have to dress somewhat skimpy. I'm almost 24 years old and I'm a lady. Over-the-top T&A showage is not in my lifestyle anymore. I've long since learned that you don't have to dress slutty to dress sexy. I'll post a pic of one of my work "outfits" one day if I can get a friend to take one.
My last day of working full time (unless I do this special project for my mom's boss) is exactly one week from today. I've been displaced. The trainee has taken my spot at the front desk and I am now in this little corner office away from everyone. I kind of love it. I finally have computer screen privacy (hence, why I have time to blog when I should be organizing pleadings.) I'm gonna miss everyone, but I'm excited about the next phase of my life as well.
Ummmm, what else?
I had dinner with a girl I ex-ed out of my life last summer, due to a misunderstanding. It was surprisingly easy to talk to her. Idk about actually becoming "friends" with her again, or whether either of us have a desire to do so, but, we'll see what happens. She's going to school at the Alma Mater in the fall, so, if I attend, there's a better chance that we will begin speaking on a regular basis again, and who knows where that will lead?
My mother asked me to be a co-borrower for a home mortgage so she doesn't have to miss out on the $8,000 home-buyers stimulus check. Yeah right. $200,000+? My senior year of college, we had a disagreement about her paying me back $40. And to be trapped in that for 35 years? IDK what she was thinking.
I speak to my uncle now, after a huge blowup. He's still selfish, and he bough himself some little raggedy fall-apart car. He parks this piece of crap in the garage, but one Saturday morning, he tried to express some concern for my well-being by telling me that he saw some men in our backyard and asking me to be careful. I feel if he really cared about my safety, he wouldn't have me struggling to find street parking late at night, esp. in my neighborhood. (Which reminds me... I hope this isn't like last Friday night, when I returnd home from "work" around 3am and had to circle the block for 15 minutes before finally finding a spot a block and a half away down a dark street.)
I don't have any other updates, except a couple that I'll make a separate posts about.
I'm sorry if my tone is a little negative or melancholy. I'm under a lot of stress right now, b/c I don't know where I'll be in the next month, and it's super important. I'm doing everything in my power to maintain a positive outlook on everything.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
My Sincere Apologies
I've been very internal lately. Many thoughts have been churning in my mind, but I haven't had the energy to write them. I used to have the most inspiration to Blog on Friday nights or Saturday mornings.
I've actually been sacrificing my Friday Night Me Time lately. I think it's b/c it's summer and I have a car. This Friday, though, it's all about Experience. I'm gonna close the blinds, light some candles, lay on my bed and THINK. Then I'll see if I'm more motivated to write about all the things that I've been busy trying NOT to think about.
I've actually been sacrificing my Friday Night Me Time lately. I think it's b/c it's summer and I have a car. This Friday, though, it's all about Experience. I'm gonna close the blinds, light some candles, lay on my bed and THINK. Then I'll see if I'm more motivated to write about all the things that I've been busy trying NOT to think about.
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