Those Random Attributes Posts

Ok... Here I go again... Jumping on another bandwagon... At least this one isn't costing me any money...

25 Random Things About Me (and maybe more depending on if I feel like stopping)

1. I choose my words very carefully. When thinking about the words I want to use, I'm determining the level of ambiguity or disclosure I want to use based on the person and the situation... (This is my substitute for lying. If I never commented on something, you can't say I lied about it, can you? I do realize that this can be pretty deceptive, but in most cases, the things I choose to omit are things which are none of the other person's business in the first place... Things which shouldn't affect the person whether they know or not. The funny thing is, I get mad at ppl for not disclosing info to me... But this is when the info DOES affect me... I think that I'm a better judge at whether certain info is on a need-to-know basis than others are...)

2. I HATE liars... When I'm lied to, I group the liar into a category with every person who has ever hurt me as a result of their lies, or any other reason. Sometimes I blow small lies out of proportion because I'm comparing them to THE ULTIMATE LIAR... I don't know if this is good or bad, but I'm pretty darn honest with myself and with others, so I feel that every one in my life should be as well.

3. I am secretly envious of my friends (all 1 of them that I know of) who are in fulfilling, respectful, loving relationships.

4. Conversely, I think all of my friends who are in bad relationships are incredibly stupid; especially if they've been in bad relationships before... I feel like they should have learned their lesson from the previous situation... Also, based on the things I've learned about myself since my bad "relationship", I feel that people who stay in a situation when they KNOW it doesn't feel right or isn't good for them, are seriously lacking in self esteem in some aspect of their life, and that there's nothing I can do to help them.... They've gotta figure it out on their own...

5. I feel that people who were raised relatively well-off can't possibly understand some of the struggles I go through, especially things that are connected to money, like spur of the moment financial obligations, or even just simple things b/c when you don't have a lot of money, every decision needs to be calculated... I need to know my beginning and my ending, even regarding simple things like a night out. For example, I don't like to be a burden to people by asking them to come get me to go out, even if I really want to go out with them. And I don't like having to put gas money in other people's cars, because I'd rather save that money toward getting my own car and then that just makes the whole going out process even MORE expensive. And then I don't like being tired and ready to go home but not being able to say something cuz I'm not the driver anyway.... Okay. Maybe I'm being dramatic, b/c friends have told me that I'm not a burden to them but still... I feel like I am sometimes and they just don't get it.

6. The two days my mother let me borrow her car a couple of months ago (for the first time ever in life) were the best two days of my life! I felt so free, and it lit a fire under my butt to hurry up and get my car before march...

7. I think too much and over analyze situations, often to my own detriment. Sometimes, in my analytical process, I'll have arrived at the right conclusion, but then no, I don't act on that one... I'll keep on analyzing and act on the one that ends up messing stuff up!

8. I secretly think that in meeting me, EVERYONE has an ulterior motive, and then any friendships that ensue emerge later... After the person realizes how awesome I am!

9. I think I am one of the most giving, selfless people in the world... until I'm crossed... Then I can be a pretty mean, evil person...

10. I sleep cuddled with my doggie, even though he has the worst dog breath ever... I just turn his head in the opposite direction.

11. I LOOOOVVVEEE weave b/c I love how I look with long hair... It makes me feel glamorous! I'm turning into such a length whore... Maybe next winter I'll try butt-length? ;-) However, since I hate to lie, it makes me sad when I have a really good weave and ppl ask if it's my hair and I'm forced to tell the truth... I wish people would mind their business! If you can't tell it's a weave, don't ask, shoot! lol.

12. I'm lactose intolerant, but love pretty much anything with cheese in it... ANYTHING...

13. I'm afraid sometimes that I won't be sexually attracted to or satisfied by the man that's perfect for me... I know looks and sex aren't everything, but.............. I guess they're kind of important to me.

14. I'm learning to cut people out of my life completely... I can do the whole no communication thing, but I am still working on cutting them out of my brainspace...

15. I wonder what things might have been like had I been born to a different mother. I think that she was a crippling influence in my life for quite some time...

16. I adopt other people's families because I wish I was born into a big loving family. I hope that my husband has a big loving family with family reunions and cookouts, etc.

17. Most guys that I've dated recently only make it past a couple of dates if I'm bored.

18. I change my number like once a year to help get certain people out of my life. It makes me feel good that in the rare event that someone I dislike has decided to try to contact me, in most cases, they can't. This is also why my facebook profile is so restricted.

19. I'm a sexual being but I get disgusted when dudes want to talk about it over the phone, like a play-by-play of what they want me to do to them or vice versa... Gross... Just drive over here... It's even MORE disgusting if I've never discussed anything sexual with a dude before, b/c if I haven't even brought it up, it means I don't view dude like that, and bringing it up will make me peg him as disrespectful and one-track-minded, so I won't even want to be bothered.

20. I believe I could be the world's best wife... If given the chance.

21. I'm preparing myself for marriage... I think this is why I refuse to deal with guys who don't seem like husband material right out the gate... I don't want to feel like I'm wasting my time.

22. I kinda feel bad for many guys who try to talk to me, even the ones who are decent enough to get my #. I feel like I'm comparing them to this skeleton model of what I need my guy to be like, and if they don't match up, they'll be ignored or if they don't get the hint, will hear me saying a blunt, "look, I'm really not interested in you like that... I only gave you my number because I spilled sweet and sour sauce on your pants and felt bad. Sorry." I lose interest quickly if I'm not seeing the qualities I'm looking for. I realize I'm picky but I think that being selective keeps me from turning into one of the stupid friends I'm thinking about in #4. (Or into the stupid girl I was 6 mos. to 4 years ago...

23. I LOVE dogs... like I could spend hours in a pet store... Playing with dogs makes me very happy and reminds me of when I was little and my mom was sad... We'd go to the pet store and play with the puppies.

24. I HATE when ppl misjudge me... especially when they don't know me...

25. I'm sensitive... I'm growing out of my crybaby phase, but it still hangs around sometimes...

26. I think I'm one of the fattest people I know... Like mentally... If my night ends in eating, it's usually a good night...

27. I'm self conscious about my acne.

28. If I'm in the house all day being lazy and nobody's around me, I may not shower... (I know... gross)

29. I'm in a state of personal conflict as I try to understand God's will for my life and match my own desires to it. I struggle with the notion of being a single Christian woman, and I do a lot of thinking about relationships and sex, especially the "sinful" aspect of sex in Christianity.

30. I wish I had a big brother, especially in Jr. High and High School. I wish I knew my daddy, too... For all the obvious psychological/emotional reasons, but also, so that when people ask me what I'm mixed with (because I MUST be mixed in order to be a black girl with curly hair... please note the sarcasm) I could give a definitive answer instead of either announcing the first random ethnicity that pops into my head or saying "Black and African-American" :-)

31. I don't understand why people see me and automatically assume I'm stuck up or selfish. I think I'm pretty, but I don't think that people should look at me and automatically peg me as conceited, w/o me ever opening my mouth or anything... I don't think I act like I'm prettier than anyone else...

31. I consider myself self-centered, especially as of late. I don't think it's a bad thing either. I think that every move I make in life is about making my SELF a happier, better person. So I'm spending a lot of time thinking about and acting for myself. If someone or something doesn't align with the idea of the life that I want for myself, then I don't want anything to do with that person or thing.

32. I'm afraid of being an out of shape older person with a saggy belly and boobs... But I still haven't quite worked up the courage to work out regularly... Maybe I'll join a gym when I get my car?

33. I think I can learn a lot about people by their perception of me!

34. I'd be happy if I could get a breast reduction. I only want to be a C-cup. Like in high school. I think D is too big because I'm short and I can't wear a lot of the clothes I'd like to wear. I'm also concerned that when I have kids, they'll start to sag... :-(

35. I don't believe that guys genuinely start out wanting to be my friend and my friend only. I believe that if they could, they would all sleep with me.

36. I think that hoes mess it up for the genuine girls in the world and cause guys to treat all women disrespectfully because they're so used to treating the hoes like whatever...

37. I HATE loud @$$ commercials.... Like when you have the show you're watching at the perfect level and some commercial comes on and almost bursts your eardrums... It's tres annoying.

K. I'm done typing.